Dear Matt...

Dear Matt and fans of Matt, who have ventured into my blog,

Thank You for reading. And accompanying me thus far.

While Matt has been lauded as somewhat of a counsellor and guiding light and pacer, and an extraordinary friend, i think he has to fail to see who i really am. Amidst that

light that i am a tryathlete. He has helped me and

encouraged me in my journey through my marathon. His words also ring in my head, as a gentle reminder of being appreciative and thankful, and that my life isn't as bad as it seems. Life as a part time fun seeking triathlete has been a blessed one so far.

If you haven't read my past years' blogposts, a run through of my mostly read websites should give you an inkling of who i am, as Eve.

My top few fave websites, in no particular order are :

• Triathlon Family Forum
• Purseblog
• Bag That Style
• Matthew's Blog
• Reeves' blog on innovation and branding
• Enrico's blog on leadership
• BagaholicBoy
• WhoWhatWear ... blog on latest fashion fads and outfits.
• TedTalks
• Net-a-Porter for seeking inspiration on what else to wear

One could then deduce what kind of girl i am. A girl with mixed identity. I have came a

long way in terms of my sporting life. What Matt doesn't know is before 2007 (refer to picture on right of girl in blue dress), i was but the average girl. I am fair-skinned, long hair, occasionally parading my flouncy curly hairstyle, trotting my latest huge Louis Vuitton bag to Orchard Road. Now i am still considered "fair", but only to the triathletes and runners. I have a simple hairstyle that i could just tie it up before heading out to partake in any form of sports. I still shop but look at a lot more tri suits and running wear. I don't think it's however wrong to put my prada bag onto my aerobars, while pushing my bike when sending it to service.

One minute i talk about bikes from Cervelos to Pinarellos, the next i am talking about the next bag i want the Proenza Schouler PS1, or the Alexandra Wang laidback style of oversized tee and cuffed shorts. I don't forget my roots.

A funny incident to put the whole "omg, did she just say that?" into your world. During the first ride of 2010, I tied my hair into a bun and attempted to put my entire head of hair into my helmet, only to realize it won't work. The helmet is too loose to be safe on the road. So i turned to Julian for help. And he shook his head and went "aiyoooo". And he go on to say that he knew i am a bimbo. The blonde roots illuminated.

To one & all, welcome to my bimbo world.

I am a bimbo and darn proud of it.

But please don't get me started on how Singapore got their network on, cos i'll probably make you piss in your pants with my very limited knowledge having being in the IT Telecoms field for a period of time.

{The End}

The writer Eve has left the building, with her tod's bag in tow, and those smashing 4 inch heels and she's intending to go clock her 14km run later in the day.

Easy Money.

Some days you are free. Others you are too busy. One should never forget the bad day, as well as they remember the good days. My mom puts it across to me that human beings are forgetful. They forget when they actually have so much time on hand that they can facebook all day, and when the work falls hard and fast on their laps, they forget that it's time to put in that extra mile.

Being an employer, and having to listen to a team of men lamenting about how tough their job is, i wonder if they put themselves in my shoes. Do i need to listen to their bad experience? I have talked to quite a few of them, and i told them :"i've heard them all, all the bad experiences. Do you want to conquer and continue? Or leave? There will be no bad blood, if you stop spewing crap". I do give them their well-deserved "bitching hour", as i call it. I know when they feel down and upset. I would give extra jobs to those that i know whom have gone the extra mile to make my job an easier one.

I have met men who just think money are an easy thing to earn. And that their job should be as easy as what they feel it to be. Yet they fall short of my expectations when they are supposed to do X to Z. Instead, they called back and bitched to other current and potential colleagues about how bad i am, and the service is. Let me tell you this : you would get what you deserve, just wait.

Before you wonder why i stopped my sports, i am tired lately from work. The pressure, the amount of stuff to do is still increasing. Do i lament about it? Yea, but i fight on. Cos i believe in payback. There's no such thing as easy money. Perhaps there is, if you sell your ass.

And the workload piles on

Matt, besides being my running pacer, is someone who never fails to motivate me. His words kept repeating : don't be angry at something that pays for your hobbies. As the work starts to multiply, and my stress levels go haywire, i stop and think back on what he says. So the inner anger is gone.

I need to go run.

the vicious cycle of business

Recently, I had the privilege to covet a contract that supplies manpower to help deal with overflow issues faced by other contractors. The client planned a 100 piece per day workload for us, and told us to furnish guys. We went through a lot to hire the correct help to deal with the issue.

However, it seems like i got the bad end of the deal. Especially when i see 11 piece a day. And i can't afford to retain the current set of employees, let alone new ones. Today i felt particularly bad when a potential employee had to be told that we can't accept him after he has resigned from a competitor because our client could not furnish us with the appropriate number of duties.

In his words, he said i am "putting sand into other people's ricebowl".

Tell me how am i not going to feel upset. I've been good so far. I try my very best. But yet sometimes i had to fail my own men.

The first run of 2010

I fell sick right after the ride. Truth be told, i am not all well yet. I am every doctor's nightmare, the patient from hell. I can't sit still. My work is driving me crazy. So I did a brief session of yoga mid week in the midst of my tight schedule that cleared my nose, as i held my pose. That reaffirmed my faith that i had to move to breathe well.

I made a few calls leading up to the weekend. I had to either ride or run. I can't swim, knowing very well of my run in with pneumonia-like symptoms, and the usual condition of water in lungs whenever i swim when sick. At 7am on Sunday, i pushed the P2C out and went for my second ride on Sunday with a runny nose to have a piece of toast and those yummy runny eggs (yes, to match my runny nose). But the ride went by too fast, as i stood there with a friend staring at the door step of Ya Kun, only to realize they are not opened yet. We had overestimated ourselves and the timing. So we managed to climb a wee bit of Mt Faber, ahhh, the memories of pain and panting. I like. Not to the mention the wonderful weather. That made my Sunday really happy.

I forgot how fast the weekend has gone by. As i struggled to deal with the work schedule and stress plus Monday blues, i knew i had to squeeze whatever time i could to pamper myself and to get my workout in. So I embarked on my first run this evening, after a hearty dinner with the family. Along the way, i enjoyed the sights of running at 9pm. It felt good to be back on the road again, however short the distance may be.

New Year Resolutions Twenty Ten. & That 1st Ride of 2010

Twenty Ten.

It's been 10 years since the millennium bug left us worried what would happen when our heavily reliant on IT society crosses the year 2000 mark. That ended up in dust. All our worries are for naught. Ten years on, has it been that long? We're now looking at 2012 to see if the world as we know it to be would cease to exist. I guess, for now, let's live it for the moment. And like Chris Allen or The Script would sing ...."gotta live like we're dying".

What's my resolutions this year? I was to declutter, get lean and get into grad school for 2009. And i said i would attempt 50%. I did, i think. I threw some old stuff, I got slightly leaner in my last day of 09, than i did in 08. I gave up the graduate school idea. Things happened along the way of 2009, i decided to sort out what my focus should be, and further evaluate what requires more of my time. So that's good.

For 2010, i want to

1. Be more focused in work and building my business
2. Be a lil more toned and lean.
3. Be more appreciative of my surroundings. The family & friends.

For 2010, i didn't want to start the first week on a bad note. I spent New Year's Lunch with the family. I did my lil party, resolved not to be too drunk. I went on my first bike ride.

The 2010 Triathlon Family Leisure Ride. A 30k (thereabouts) ride. It was enjoyable. And refreshing. I met a lot of old faces, and some new ones. Caught up with the drama, and the sweat. And many thanks to Yongfeng for that Christmas Present. Love it... and of cos, to bitch along the ride. The thing is i felt i need to ride more. The bar tape's coming off, which meant i need to spend more time with the machine.

End of the day, i felt slight saddle sore... but really happy. I am really happy.

2009 in perspective.

Ahhh yes, another year. I've been reading through my 2007 and 2008 entries with regards to my thoughts on the days that has passed. I felt truly appreciative of what went through the years, and how every event has changed and altered my life.

I have the same bunch of friends and maybe more. I still have my SBW. Although in the last month or so, i've severely neglected them due to work. I'm really sorry about this. I love them to bits still, and am amazed how wonderfully close we all are even if we are of different characters. We may not be spending as much time together, as our lives take a turn. Some, for work. Others, for family. We still are together, and never fail to have a great time while being out with one another. I felt we could truly understand each other. And we need to organize more rock band sessions! As well as a driving trip. There's a need for speed.

I have a new bunch of friends : the haters. They hate on each other so much, that even Erik thinks it's infectious. Nonetheless, they live close enough to me. And we're generally on the same wavelength, even if we're from all walks of life, and different age groups. They seem like one huge fantastic family. Birthdays are not quite the same, it's filled with fun, and extreme bouts of hating. I made a few closer friends through the amount of time spent hating everywhere. I am thankful... and quite frankly, looking forward to spending more time to know the others better. The group is too huge... and growing!

In triathlon, I haven't done much this year. I had a couple of runs, and two triathlons. I had my first DNF and DNS. I finished my 1st Marathon running

through the entire thing. I had a few PBs, in my OD race, my 10km, and of cos my marathon. I found a fantastic running partner, Matt. He's like a elder brother, who never fails to inspire me and motivate me to go further. I look forward to 2010 running sessions with him. And the amount of talk really lift my spirits. And his "nevermind, just eat. you deserve it" attitude... hahaha, i like. I also managed to hang out a lot more with a bunch of girls who dabble into triathlon. Joanne, i'm waiting for you to pop so we can get back to running those womens only runs together.

Work-wise, it hasn't been that great till December. But i am loving the madness so far, and really hope it'll be an excellent 2010 for my work! I managed to pick up diving during the lull period. And fallen in love with the ocean.

2009 has been an awesome year. I'm going to take a few days to figure what my 2010 resolutions are. But i am guessing it's still the same ol ' "i don't wanna get fat". I did get lean for a while. My marathon pic is pretty awesome, flat tummy & all. But you know what... i put it back on during Christmas feasting and New Year. So getting lean is still one of those things. That being said... i shall end my post here.

BRING IT ON, 2010

Things i grew appreciative of...

Out of the eight and half years i have been working, never once have i felt so appreciative of friends, nor the extent of work my employees deliver. I was recently given the chance to feel what it is like to forget what i was working on over the past few hours, only to realize it's 6pm (almost time to knock off), and i really haven't gotten anything done. Emerging out of office usually at 7-ish pm, or even 8pm, when the skies are dark, i realized how much i yearned for the company and warmth of being around my friends.

The past weekend was a fruitful one. Jana my longtime collegemate came back. And we always have a good time catching up on old days, and it's a nice reminder for Christmas of how much i miss being in Purdue and how much i miss the crazy friends who i knew were made for life. We sat together watching Victor get married, and having a chuckle here and there over how fast time flies.

I met Matthew my trusty pacer for a run on Saturday morning. I am appreciative that God has given Matt to come save my wretched running soul, motivating me as i run along. Matt's warped at times, but i am following. I was bitching about calorie overload over the 1 hour 30 mins run from F2 and to B1 along East Coast. He however thinks it's worth it. Ahh well... it was yummy nonetheless. Big enough a breakfast to last me thru the work day.. all till dinner. Had a good time during dinner... and that milk shake thereafter. The thing about triathletes is they go home early to sleep to prepare themselves to go out to bike or run the next morning. Weekends are precious to them, cos they can expand their energy in the morning and still squeeze their nap in.

I woke up late Sunday morning, rushing to work site, only to realize "bummer, i didn't get clearance to enter the premise". Decided i should spend time with Julian over breakfast, before hopping back to nap. I managed to get most of my holiday shopping done, except one or two items which are still missing.

I came to realize, with so little time on hand for myself, i try to squeeze a run in here and there. Sacrifice a few hours of sleep to be with friends. Yet i find the urge to bitch , and to complain, and to lament over the lack of sleep. A bit tad sad. But that's life.

life after marathon...

I have talked about post-race depression. So the Standard Chartered Singapore Marathon marks the end of another year, and it's the last race of the year. I wondered about motivation and energy to head out to run, especially when it's a few weeks to Christmas.

In 08, i packed quite a fair bit of weight after marathon ended. Granted i was actually supposed to nurse my injury, i wasn't supposed to be out running or cycling. I didn't find the motivation to even go swim. I ate and partied like there's no tomorrow. I wasn't about to go down that same road again. Much as i wanted to head out of the door to go for a run or to go for a swim, i couldn't. I have quite a happy problem : i've got work! I've been tied up with work, clocking in 12 hours from 8am to 8pm. And having phonecalls from 9ish all the way till 12midnight. That's another hour added to it, before i go crashing into bed.

One week down... more ahead.

I have happy problems. And let me pray for added bonuses!

Singapore Marathon 2009

DRAFT COPY --- cos i am dazed after completing my marathon some 12 hours ago.

Sitting and huddled up in bed now at 11pm, i thought about how today went. The day of my 2nd Marathon. I woke up after receiving two wake up messages from Matthew. At 320am, you can't help but feel confused about where you were and what you should be doing. I dragged myself out of bed and changed into my outfit. FYI, i chose the white one. I grabbed some bread and slapped the peanut butter on. I wondered how fast it has been. It has been a year... how time flies.

As i started the marathon, i felt a pain across my chest, and knew today's not going to be my day again. When i got to MacDonald's East Coast, i knew i am behind schedule. At F2, i started to throw up, the start of many burps and inability to hold down any form of food / gel / liquids. At the 30km mark, i felt like it was an eternity. At the F1 pit area, i felt i had to get going to end my suffering.

At 42.195km, i am a finisher. A finisher, with a huge smile "like my GCE got all As", according to Matt. The experience is extremely humbling. A good reminder that i still lack good amount of distance running. I am glad, given i haven't really ran all year, to even finish a marathon, with minimal walking.

And To Matt, THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart. Cos i know, without you, i may have walked the entire distance or may have given up. Thank You.

There are good days... and there would be bad days

I had pretty bad backaches leading up to the final week prior to Standard Chartered Singapore Marathon. I am talking about the stress my body has been going through during the course of the week. A couple of bad news got me caught up. I lost my appetite along with the increment of work stress. Sigh... i guess i can't do much about it, except to suck it up and walk on! I have to walk on, with flair. If all else fails, i have to always look good.

So... it's less than 12 hours away to the start of the Standard Chartered Marathon/09.

Am i ready?

I can't say i am. But what should i wear?

Black top or white top?

Is this a fashion parade? I guess.. like i said, if all else fails, i have to always look good.

to go compression or not?

So the 42.195km race is coming this weekend. 6 more days away.

Do i feel scared? Yes. Well duh, i can't imagine 42km.

Do i feel prepared? Well, a little less than last year. Err... a lot less.

Now this morning, Matthew text messaged me about running in a pair of compression socks. This is a decision six days before a marathon. I question the style factor. It's going to look clownish. But like Matt says, we'll see if i look like a clown when i cramp. So whatever rocks one's performance while pounding the tarmac for 42km, i guess!

Joe Friel's blog wrote about it, and i quote

"* improving venous return to the heart,

* preventing muscles from moving unnecessarily as with excess vibration meaning less fatigue, and
* speeding recovery."

Thus the socks are supposed to delay the onset of cramps.

So what do you think? Fashion faux pax? Or it's going to help with the run?

Mileage worth mentioning....

Over the past week, i've found a new running partner : Matthew. He's finished his IM Western Australia in 08, and headed for IM Langkawi in 2010. We've always been talking. And talking to me almost never fails to motivate me to continue to throttle on, despite whatever the naysayers may say.

Truthfully, i never liked running with others. I know i will kill everyone cos i am not very fast. With the injury looming and gone, i just lacked the confidence to actually follow the pace or pace others. I liked the fact of running alone, accompanied by my choice of R&B and Rap music, to assist in the beat of pounding the tarmac.

So one faithful wednesday evening, i decided to give it a shot to try running with someone. We surprisingly have pretty decent pace chemistry. And so i decided we should do the same distance or longer on Sunday too. And now, we're approaching 30km tomorrow, the last of our long run before the 42.195km next Sunday. I aimed to finish in good fitness and good time, sans any form of injuries.

Oh... and i promised i will run with him... till IM Langkawi.

New Balance Real Run 2009

I had a pretty awful run on the morning of New Balance Real Run 2009. Been nursing an incredible pain on my left ear, due to a ear infection, i came down with the usual Ear Nose Throat symptoms : flu and sore throat. At 3am that morning, my nose clogged up with phelgm.

Still i persisted on going, as i haven't been waking up at 5am for a long time, and wondered what running in the morning felt like. I met my cousin Jeremy there, and managed to squeeze in a hug.

Race went on fine... although i stopped to take a breather, face flushed, heartrate went haywire (not because i met some cutie), and i started breaking into cold sweat. I will not run when i feel that badly on the morning of a race anymore.

For now, i am nursing my battered legs... and that nasty ear infection.

Till i run again! Adios.

Eve

Eve
Originally uploaded by kaacha!!.

A friend of mine took some pictures of me and my ride - My Mini CooperS recently. There were good ones and bad ones. Mostly due to the lack of sleep... and lack of exercise.

Ahhh well, i think i still look good.

Halloween...

I've been tired. Really tired. For the entire week leading up to Halloween. Perhaps it's the beer on tuesday with some

of the guys who finished The North Face 50km or 100km Duo through the trails. It was tough race with the heat and steepness of those hills, i heard. Tempted to jump on the 2010 version of it, just for the kick of it. I still do try my very best to keep up with some form of running. Twice a week at the very least, with a minimum of run walk 8km. That's not a lot... i know. But this is all i can manage for now.

Or that fatigue came from Thursday Night Drinking Club with some friends. Or that lil photo session i had on friday that got me three hours of sleep (this deserves a post on its own, for a picture or two). That fatigue and exhaustion all rolled into Saturday. I had a really crazy halloween on a bus shuttling to different places, eventhough i called it a night by 1am. Too tired that i fell asleep. But cheers to all who showed up... and partied out and the ones who hate. There were one too many dirty pictures, thankfully not from me. They were a huge form of entertainment, and serves as good memory as who's the crazy closet stripper amongst us. And I am happy with one halloween a year. Not too many, cos i am too tired. ZzzzzzZZzzz..

Now to get my ass back to running...

We need to talk

As with all friends, and family, we need to communicate. And talking is, in my opinion, the best way to communicate. Sure there's always bonding over food, seriously crazy bonding over excessive amount of beer. For others, there's team sports or even individualistic sports like swimming, and training together in packs. But there's always talk.

I do think my gift and downfall is my ability to talk. The gift of the gab has opened opportunities and doors to work, and my social life. That gift is also my downfall, when i talk too much, or react too fast without thinking.

Of late, i am cornered to think what is right, and what is wrong. Perhaps my mom is right. The world is round, and sometimes it's better not to say anything cos it might come back to you. Yet on the other hand, i am so compelled by my own emotions to take charge of the situation.

So i turned to running and swimming, hoping a little workout would kill my angst and thoughts. I figure if i am still thinking about the next day, i probably should act on it. Sometimes, i wonder if it's right to act on it. When i acted on it, i realized my emotions took hold of me. I am sure i am not regretting it. I only meant well, and looking out for the ones i care for. I choose not to speak, only when i do not know where to go, and when i figure it's time to let you go.

Perhaps only one song can sum up what i want to say :

"Step one you say we need to talk

He walks you say sit down it's just a talk

He smiles politely back at you

You stare politely right on through

Some sort of window to your right

As he goes left and you stay right

Between the lines of fear and blame

You begin to wonder why you came

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend

Somewhere along in the bitterness

And I would have stayed up with you all night

Had I known how to save a life

Let him know that you know best

Cause after all you do know best

Try to slip past his defense

Without granting innocence

Lay down a list of what is wrong

The things you've told him all along

And pray to God he hears you

And pray to God he hears you

....(continued)"

How To Save A Life --- The Fray

under the sea...

Barely a month or two ago, i have subconsciously made up my mind that i won't take up diving. The time and money committed to such a leisurely sport would surely take a toll on my wallet.

Fast forward to one day of mayhem hanging around, i thought "oh, why not?"

One week of mulling whether to do it... interrupted by fears earthquakes and aftershocks, and of course, tidal waves. One week of class and pool lessons. I am open water certified!

That weekend spent doing open water dives to ensure i know how to safeguard my own ass as well as my buddy's has made me embrace the sea even more. I a

m surprised to find clear waters just off of Pulau Dayang, off Mersing, Malaysia. The travelling there is tiring, accommodations were sparse, not that i mind. Not one bit at all. It was about loving the water, and taking in sights underwater.

Those images underwater would be etched in my memory. I remember, during a dive my instructor pointed at a fish and signal a sign for eating. So after that, i asked "so pomfret? you said can eat...". He shook his head and decided i'm always hungry and always sleepy. But you know what? It's meant to be a leisure sport. However, you need to be physically fit all the time to be able to withstand days of diving and the multiple dives it involves. It's an experience i think more people should partake in.

"under the sea under the sea,

down here it's better,

down where it's better,

take it from me"

Of September

I am reluctant to admit how fast every September always seem to fly by, despite being event packed. I realized now, how soon i am to running yet another marathon, it's been almost a year. I also realized how little i have seen my own training mates. It was nice to have receive a message or two from the usual training mates. :)

I posted a question on facebook asking, the friends i'm linked with, what they have done all September and how did they end it. I can't quite put down in words what happened in September.

All i know is October's here, and we gotta keep it moving.

All i wanna do is to see you smile...

Dear friend,

I hope you've been well. Everytime i see you smile, it tries to hide the amount of pain you have. The people around you feels it too. But we do not know how to approach it. We're all different when it comes to dealing with pain.

Some of us are not as sensitive or new age. We just shrug it off, and bury ourselves into work. Some of us focus on sports, and try something new. Some turn to spiritual help. Some turn to sappy love songs, to cry it all out. But remember, it's only worth that much tears. You may look back and think how silly it all is... as time goes by. I know i did.

"Time will always heal the pain, bring the sun and drive the rain" so sings Tommy Page, circa 90s? Old song as it is, it speaks of the truth. Then time would erase all bitter memories, and bring about happier ones.

I tried to just switch topic, much as i know you would like to discuss it. To me, the less you carry the topic off that tip of your tongue, the less you will think about it. Perhaps to you, by saying and discussing that pain would allow for more comfort. The topic will always be part of you, but it doesn't have to be now, when the pain is raw and out in the open. It's akin to rubbing salt on it, and just opening it a little bigger.

A friend once sang this song to me when i felt the exact same pain, and here i wish for you to be happy... and to smile again!

我無法幫妳預言
委曲求全有沒有用
可是我多麼不捨
朋友愛的那麼苦痛

愛可以不問對錯
至少要喜悅感動
如果他總為別人撐傘
妳何苦非為他等在雨中

泡咖啡讓妳暖手
想擋擋妳心口裡的風
妳卻想上街走走
吹吹冷風會清醒的多

妳說妳不怕分手
只有一點遺憾難過
情人節就要來了 剩自己一個
其實愛對了人 情人節每天都過

分手快樂　祝妳快樂
妳可以找到更好的
不想過冬　厭倦沉重
就飛去熱帶的島嶼游泳

分手快樂　請妳快樂
揮別錯的才能和對的相逢
離開舊愛　像坐慢車
看透徹了心就會是晴朗的

沒人能把誰的幸福沒收
妳發誓妳會活的有笑容

妳自信時候真的美多了